Hey MS Dhoni, No Balls?

Hey MS Dhoni, No Balls? 4.33/5 (86.67%) 12 votes

MS Dhoni, India’s Captain Cool, seems to have lost his golden touch. His Midas Touch is now considered a MidArse Douche by most cricketers and cricket lovers around the world.

As it is, Cricket as a game is gradually losing a lot of shine. The bat industry crisis in Jalandhar is an indicator of things to come. Then, there’s the IPL that has wrecked Indian cricket, but more on this in another article.

MS Dhoni and his insipid captaincy in Australia are compounding matters for the already disappointed cricket lovers. Though wins and losses are part of the game, what happened in the One-Day International at Manuka Oval, Canberra was inexcusable. India were cruising at 277/1 and were all out for 323 when they could have won easily. It was a terrible performance by MS.

But it angered the cricket lover in us enough to write about the personal and professional lows in MS Dhoni’s life.

The Goat Sacrifice in 2008


Way back in 2008, Dhoni angered the nation by sacrificing a goat at a Ranchi temple to celebrate India’s tri-series triumph in Australia.

In India, animal sacrifice is reflective of tribal traditions and a medieval mind. Though animal sacrifices were performed in ancient India, subsequent Hindu scriptures such as the Gita, and the Puranas forbade it.

Put two and two together and you have a dorky person with a tribal medieval mindset sitting on a pot of gold.

Conflict of Interest: Rhiti Sports

In 2013, Dhoni is/was alleged to be a part owner of Rhiti Sports, which managed him Suresh Raina, Ravindra Jadeja and Pragyan Ojha.

The inference was clear: If these dudes got selected in the main Indian team, they would have advertisers running after them and consequently, Rhiti Sports stood to gain. This conflict of interest gave these players an unfair advantage over other probables.

Rhiti Sports denied the news and things got hushed up after some days.

IPL Match Fixing


SP Kumar, who was investigating into the IPL match fixing scam submitted a report to the Mudgal Committee that Kitty, a notorious bookie, had confessed that Gurunath Meiyappan had informed him that Dhoni had agreed to score 140 and lose a match. Gurunath too allegedly “confirmed” Dhoni’s involvement.

SP Kumar was transferred after he interrogated Kitty and though the matter grabbed headlines then, it was not adequately followed up.

As per India Today, Meiyappan had allegedly placed a bet of INR 1.4 crores against CSK during the match. Phone transcripts confirm that Meiyappan had told Vindoo Dara Singh that RR “is winning pakka”. On knowing that Singh had placed a bet of INR 20 lakhs on the match Meiyappan had asked him to increase the bid to INR 50 lakhs.

This IPL match was played on May 12, 2013, and true to whatever was reported by the bookie, CSK scored 141 and RR won the match.

The India Cements Job: Another Conflict of Interest

Dhoni was the captain of Chennai Super Kings. He also was the employee of India Cements. India Cements owned Chennai Super Kings. N Srinivasan, the ex-BCCI Chief, was and is the boss of India Cements.

After losing two series in England and Australia, the Board of Selectors unanimously recommended that Dhoni be sacked as captain.

N Srinivasan vetoed their recommendation and MS Dhoni stayed on, only to bring more misery to India’s cricket lovers. Another major conflict of interest.

Dhoni as Lord Vishnu


In 2013, MS was portrayed as Lord Vishnu for Business Today’s cover story, God of Big Deals. He was shown as having many hands, just like the God, and in one hand he was shown holding a shoe.

We are a touchy country and someone took objection to the pose and sued Dhoni.

The High Court too observed: “A celebrity and a cricketer like Dhoni should know the consequences of hurting religious sentiments of people. He should have known the consequences of doing such ads.

The SC has stayed criminal proceedings, and the last on this matter has yet to be heard.

The Dhoni-Kohli Cold War


Virat Kohli and MS Dhoni don’t like each other.

When MS Dhoni was named in the IPL match fixing scam, Virat happily retweeted the news.

In the middle of 2015, after India’s loss to Bangladesh in the one dayers, Virat Kohli stated he was not happy with the way things were handled in the series. He said that the lack of clarity in the players’ minds was evident in their game.

There is some kind of war brewing between these two. Watch this space for more action.

Summing Up

It is evident that MS is coming apart and that he is not the right guy to lead India in any match. It’s time he got the boot.

That said, MS has proved most of his critics wrong and I wish he regains his balls and make us feel ashamed of this piece.



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